Jon mac has a boner!

[CntStpTheStnk06]

gopro your next adventure please. LOL

hahahaha please add appropriate sensors lmao

[CntStpTheStnk06]

Jon Mac is about to seal the deal with the second bitch this evening...... Caleb is lost ....... What's new

[Bigbike]

Yoooo lost

[Bigbike]

Soou

[hippie metal]

[CntStpTheStnk06]

Caleb is lost again!

[Bigbike]

Caleb is lost again!

[konastinky1234]

Stand by for further information ladies and gentlemen. We have a crisis on our hands please advise.

[CntStpTheStnk06]

Jon macs boner was like Caleb's limp wrist

[Calabrate2]

[Bigbike]

Jon macs boner was like Caleb's limp wrist

Idk what to say to this.... Haha what a night.

[Burton58]

Stand by for further information ladies and gentlemen. We have a crisis on our hands please advise.

preggers!

[konastinky1234]

ladies and gentlemen it has been a long time.


jon mac checking in with a few past experiences for your enjoyment.....

sometime in may....
galica, philthephilosopher, and i decide to go to mezzos in middletown. ratio looks positive. we're in the upstairs for no more than 5 minutes and the two homeliest looking girls in the place come to talk to me and get me. yeah, no thank you. awkwardness ensues. we proceed to get drunk up in the place. suddenly a sexy woman begins to talk to galica. she wants to know who his friend is. the blonde one. yes. introduces me and asks how old i am. i fuck up and say 21, my fault, she says she's 27. she comes back around and gives me a smooch but tells me i'm too young. she does it again. poor girl must not be able to see. at closing we go outside and see her on the bench by herself. i go to talk to her and what do ya know? she used to be a swimmer. i'm immediately ready to rock. give me a swimmer and i'll show ya what's good. over 75% of the girls i've had any kind of encounter with before were swimmers. she gives me her number. nice. we leave and i text her. says again that i am too young. i tell her if she ever feels young sometime to hit me up. never heard from her again.

[Buffalo Phil]

Wonderful.

[konastinky1234]

jon mac reporting in from the cape cod experience 2013. GET STUFFED

over the month of august....

third day i am in cape cod on my trip i decide i am going to go up to the beachcomber of wellfleet for a concert i was dying to see, tribal seeds. reggae on the beach is awesome and i saw this band in hartford already so i knew it would be a great night. i arrive on site and met a couple who i knew were up there. they don't want to have fun and didn't want to spend 15 measley dollars on a great concert. i don't need them. just before their departure some random guy comes and takes a piss in the parking lot during pre game hour right behind where we are talking. puts his leg up on the dune like sam adams takin a piss. after his piss he comes and talks to us and turns out our houses up there are in the same neighborhood. i say i'll meet ya inside. they leave. i say fuck this i am going in. i don't need this couple, i just met some weird guy and i'm either gonna go in and hang with his friends or find some other friends. turns out great, he's got some cool friends so we hang out and a couple of girls were with them and they were real cool. one was named crystala. then the wierd guy, who is oddly enough named jon mac-something, is all fucked up and talking to some random two girls. i figure he knows them so i ask the girl how she knows him. says she's never seen him before in her life. i say ok hi my name is john and we made fun of him for a minute or two. we hit it off talking and i ask her to go dance, she says yes. we go dance and we're both feeling it. things are going great. reggae, good lookin girl dancing. can't lose. i'm having a blast and i came to the bar all by myself. i was quite proud. then we go to leave and i get her number. her name is florence, exotic. i text her the next day and she doesn't wanna hang out......

and that's the end of that.



no need to worry, tim and phil come to visit the next weekend. we meet a couple girls who are real cool. came to surf with them the next day and we got drunk on the beach and played volleyball and said we'd come surf the night sesh with them around 6 after we went home to eat. we come back and they ditch but fuck it we surf until dark. clean up in the parking lot and head back to the comber, complete surfer status. cool. they didn't meet up with us though that night like they said they would at the bar either. not a big loss since we happened upon a BACHELORETTE PARTYYYYYYYYYYYY. they loved us and wanted us to serenade them and all kinds of things since they had a list to complete of weird things. they needed a condom but we didn't give them one. danced front and center with them for a while that night. quite fun but didn't get any unfortunately. they thought we were cute cuz we were young and had us guess their ages. we all underguessed of course, in search of some brownie points. at the end of the night, we went home empty handed but had a great time so all was well.



the next weekend arrives and the whole crew from wallingford comes up to visit me at the cape. we went to the comber thursday, friday, and saturday night. the previous weekend i went dry but this one would be a turn around. i'll skip to friday night because the other nights were just general party and we have to stick to the theme of the thread, finding women of course. so friday night, phil and i go on the dance floor. not too many people are out on the floor so we got a good open spot and start jamming with dance moves that we had been practicing for a while to attract some talent. we're feelin good and killin it and these two girls keep eyeing us from throughout the bar. we have a friend katie with us so i tell her to go tell the girls im her brother and too shy to talk to them so go dance with him. it worked amazingly, they come right over. we dance and chat a bit. tell them about our fire on the beach afterwards and the deal is sealed. we leave with the girls and get the fire ready. of course, we are struggling to start it and the girl i was after, libby, takes over and gets it roaring. we look great. after a while a bring this girl for a walk to the lifeguard stand and we sit up in it for a while enjoying the night. i ask her to skinny-dip but she's too much of a sissy. then i tell her she at least has to give me a kiss and says no she has someone special. awesome. we proceed to the parking lot and she sticks right by my side the whole way. i take a load of trash to the dumpster and she walks with me so i know she wants a smooch. i walk her to her car and both phones are dead so pen and paper has to suffice for her getting my number. real classy. i give it to her and just as about i'm about to say goodbye phil shouts across the parking lot GET STUFFED. i then look back at her all sexy like and say you wanna give me a kiss now? she says yes of course who can deny these drunk eyes. give a nice long smooch and a warm embrace and i thought for sure she wanted more. told her to call me the next day and we'd take her out to the beach and do all kinds of cool stuff but she never calls me....

jon mac and cape cod 2013, over and out. no poon was had but fun was in plentiful supply.