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A couple of jokes

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  • A couple of jokes

    1.
    A heart doctor dies.

    There was a viewing for him and many of his colleagues were there to see him for the last time.

    At the viewing the heart doctor is rolled out in his coffin. he is pushed through a curtain that has a picture of a heart on it to commemorate his achievements in the heart field.

    As the people view his dead body and tell their memories a man in the back is in laughter.

    After the viewing, one of the heart doctor's colleagues approaches the man who was laughing.

    He says "hey man that was very disrespectful, ya know, you laughing at the viewing. why were you laughing?"

    The man chuckles and replies "I am a gynocologist. Imagine what the curtain will have on it when they roll me through on a coffin."









    2.

    A man goes to the dentist to have a tooth removed.

    The doctor asks the man "would you like a local anesthetic because a tooth removal is quite painful."

    The man replies "NO. i can take pain."

    the doctor retorts "you sure?? it is quite painful"

    the man says "I guarantee you i have two other instances where i have more pain."

    the doctor says " please explain."

    " ya see, i was bear hunting and i had to take a shit. i found a place and squatted down. the first pain i had was when the bear trap went off when i squatted down."

    the doctors jaw dropped "ouch, and the second one?"

    "when i reached the end of then chain!"

    2013 F150 fx4 (Tow Pig/DD)
    • 5.0 with the 3.73 option

    2003 TJ Rubicon
    • 4.0/42rle/np241or
    • 5.13's
    • 3" Savvy/Currie suspension with acos
    • 33” BFG KO2s

  • #2
    F-
    1996 xj, waggy 44 front 5.13 gears aussie trussed, 3 links, 3.5" coils, spooled 8.8 rear, 38" tsl sx's, tnt front bumper, jesus freaks rear bumper, Olympic top hat roof rack, bunch of dumb shit
    2001 wj tbd
    1974 5 ton

    Comment


    • #3
      sorry i though theyy were hilarious.... and i am a horrible joke teller.

      let me start
      2013 F150 fx4 (Tow Pig/DD)
      • 5.0 with the 3.73 option

      2003 TJ Rubicon
      • 4.0/42rle/np241or
      • 5.13's
      • 3" Savvy/Currie suspension with acos
      • 33” BFG KO2s

      Comment


      • #4
        ill give the first one a solid C. the second one get an F cause i had to think about it
        98 XJ RIP
        05 WRX
        16 Legacy

        Originally posted by Burton58
        Ewwww jersey sucks i'm not going

        Comment


        • #5
          Deff gave me a chuckle,

          I am horrible at jokes too,

          I still ask people if they remember their first blow job or not..


          (for those of you who live under a rock like me the punch line is how'd it taste)
          Lady bugs don't like it when you paint stripes on them

          2005 WK Limited 4.7 V8, Slightly Modded

          2006 Jeep Liberty Sport 2.8L CRD Diesel Stock

          Comment

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