"Adulting"

[HeavyMetal]

My mortgage is the same as renting in the area. Renting vs buying has nothing to do with it. I chose to sell my jeep to move away and buy a house that I enjoy and if it came down to it I'm much happier owning my own home that I can do with as I please over having a jeep

Home ownership has many more costs than just a flat mortgage, thats the huge difference from renting. But thats getting off topic.

[Lawn Guyland]

nobody is saying that you need to go into debt. like it was said above. it's all about a balance. the things that make you happy don't have to cost a lot of money. but you shouldn't be throwing it all away because "adulting" says so.

[HeavyMetal]

However the one flaw I found in it (at least for me) was the notion that YOU ARE SAVING FOR RETIREMENT... you dont need a fancy car right now... you can have that later. It boggled my mind.

This is the stupidest fucking mindset on planet earth and it keeps me up at night knowing people subscribe to it. Bothers me way more than it should. WAY MORE. Nothing frustrates me more than that attitude from people. Or that advice. Just terrible. Now I am mad.

[SupermanIce-J]

well... part of "adulting" for me is getting out of the debt i put myself into when i was not adulting lol.

[SupermanIce-J]

This is the stupidest fucking mindset on planet earth and it keeps me up at night knowing people subscribe to it. Bothers me way more than it should. WAY MORE. Nothing frustrates me more than that attitude from people. Or that advice. Just terrible. Now I am mad.

im pretty sure i was about to walk out at that point... like i said... i fucking blew my mind

[HeavyMetal]

im pretty sure i was about to walk out at that point... like i said... i fucking blew my mind

If you only walked out, without leaving a grenade behind, you would do those people a disservice!!

[Harry]

I like this thread. Life is short, do what you can within reason to make yourself happy.

ROI everything, and not just in dollars.

[Pedro]

Adulting to me is a change in priorities. Not just because adulting says the norm is to buy a house and have kids and get married, but because you want to. That becomes your top priority. To take that next step in your life with the person you love, together. Every decision you make now effects somebody else directly whether you think so or not. That WJ I have in the driveway I couldn't give to two craps about anymore. I don't need it, it's the lowest priority. Do I love it? Sure, I do. But, it's just a jeep. I have better things to spend my money on now and need reliable transportation because I don't want to get stuck in the middle of winter with my son I the car and I only want one car. I could gladly keep it if I wanted to, I just don't need it. Did my wife tell me to sell it? Absolutely not, all my decision. Does that make me a lame grown up now? Absolutely not.... It's where I wanted my life to go (not because society says so) and believe me it is better than any car I have owned and sold.

In my opinion, Life becomes infinitely better with every major milestone of adulting. Marriage, then a house, now Zac. Adulting is amazing. Until youve been in the "adulting" situation, I find it hard that someone could have strong opinions against it or generally about it.

[HeavyMetal]

Until youve been in the "adulting" situation, I find it hard that someone could have strong opinions against it or generally about it.

This is the inherent problem. "Adulting" can be a condescending way of telling other people what youre doing is something they could not understand, because somehow what you are doing is "adult" and what they are doing, isn't. What makes your current journey adulting, and mine not? Do you see the issue here? Is having a kid and a house and a marriage considered the only acceptable form of "adulting" ? Is going to OER considered a non adult activity? What about OER is a non adult activity? That, in general, is the debate in this thread. And not about OER in specific. Not the social debate as to whether people should own a house or be married or have different priorities.

The problem lies in the connotation and meaning of the usage, and in some respects, the effects of the perceived notion of "adulting". No need to be defensive and justify your current life, that isnt at all what this thread is about.

That WJ I have in the driveway I couldn't give to two craps about anymore. I don't need it, it's the lowest priority. Do I love it? Sure, I do. But, it's just a jeep.

Surely you see the blatant contradiction here. Fact of the matter here is, you agree with me. You have all of the things that are being argued about, and still own the WJ, and just bought a brand new JK. So pull up a chair over on this side.

[Hydra]

I just adulted another moped, and also had 3 chalupa.

[Pedro]

This is the inherent problem. "Adulting" can be a condescending way of telling other people what youre doing is something they could not understand, because somehow what you are doing is "adult" and what they are doing, isn't. What makes your current journey adulting, and mine not? Do you see the issue here? Is having a kid and a house and a marriage considered the only acceptable form of "adulting" ? Is going to OER considered a non adult activity? What about OER is a non adult activity? That, in general, is the debate in this thread. And not about OER in specific. Not the social debate as to whether people should own a house or be married or have different priorities.

The problem lies in the connotation and meaning of the usage, and in some respects, the effects of the perceived notion of "adulting". No need to be defensive and justify your current life, that isnt at all what this thread is about.


Surely you see the blatant contradiction here. Fact of the matter here is, you agree with me. You have all of the things that are being argued about, and still own the WJ, and just bought a brand new JK. So pull up a chair over on this side.

I love the jeep,but don't give two craps about owning it anymore. That's the difference.

You're taking adulting too personally. Your version of adulting and your journey is certainly adulting, but that's not what's in question. The one in question is the house and marriage version. Not being able to go to OER because you're adulting doesn't make OER a non adult activity. It just means it's a low priority in that persons life at that time. It can be compared to any other activity like something as small as going out to dinner instead of eating home.

Now, should that person who can't go to OER because they are adulting be using it as an excuse? Probably not. But, does that necessarily mean he or she is living beyond they're means? That can be up for debate. There are a lot of times I haven't gone to places that I wanted to because it just doesn't fit the budget. Does that mean I'm living beyond my means? Meh, sometimes you just need to make sacrifices in order to afford other things.

Id be happy to keep talking about this conversation at the fire in a few weeks at OER

[Buffalo Phil]

I just adulted another moped, and also had 3 chalupa.

Fuck yeah!

[HeavyMetal]

You're taking adulting too personally.

I am? I am just having a debate topic, your previous reply took it pretty personal.

There are a lot of times I haven't gone to places that I wanted to because it just doesn't fit the budget. Does that mean I'm living beyond my means? Meh, sometimes you just need to make sacrifices in order to afford other things.

I dont buy an Ultimate Arm setup for my company because it doesnt fit my budget, it has nothing to do with my means. These are straw man points. The premise is, if you cant afford to do most of the things you used to do, that you want to do still, because of "adulting", is that truly adulting? The USE of 'adulting' as a reason you cant do something that other people the same as you are doing. You plainly see this, you are arguing/justifying other points.

Now, should that person who can't go to OER because they are adulting be using it as an excuse? Probably not.

You even agreed and proved my point inside of your post why are you arguing

Let me give you an example.

"Hey guys, I cant go to OER unfortunately because I need to breathe that day." Sub anything for OER, this isnt an OER thread

[Hydra]

I feel like the act of adulting is something that should be done, and executed as one naturally grows.

But, I don't think it should be used as an excuse for why you can't do the things you want.

It irks me that Pete feels like we're pointing fingers at him (really it's at Alex{I KID}) and other people who truly are making sacrifices for their kids or new goals. That's not what it's about.

This discussion is really just railing against the idea that to become ADULT, one must excise the "frivolous" pursuits of your younger years from your life.

[HeavyMetal]

I feel like the act of adulting is something that should be done, and executed as one naturally grows.

But, I don't think it should be used as an excuse for why you can't do the things you want.

It irks me that Pete feels like we're pointing fingers at him (really it's at Alex{I KID}) and other people who truly are making sacrifices for their kids or new goals. That's not what it's about.

This discussion is really just railing against the idea that to become ADULT, one must excise the "frivolous" pursuits of your younger years from your life.

What this guy said.

And yes Alex was the one first to mention it here recently, lol, but I see this constantly everywhere, definitely not just here.