texts from last night

[Lawn Guyland]

this website is going to be the reason i fail my final tomorrow.


and i am so okay with that...i haven't stopped laughing

[Asian Mike]

(401): The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance

[Lawn Guyland]

(315): my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple

(330): So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud


I CANT STOP

[Asian Mike]

nicole, we need to get off of this website. it's ruining our lives

[Lawn Guyland]

(978): Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
(617): Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom

[Even]

Nicole, i think you need an intervention, you are clearly fucking hooked on this shit.

[Lawn Guyland]

Nicole, i think you need an intervention, you are clearly fucking hooked on this shit.

i seriously cannot stop. this is so bad.

this is what happens when it's finals week & everyone leaves me to go to KOH and i don't want to studyyyyyyyy.

[1Amabile]

i cant get hooked to another one of these sites, fmylife.com and imsobadatsex.com already too much for me

[Lawn Guyland]

www.whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com

[Asian Mike]

www.whythefuckdoyouhaveakid.com

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH where the hell do u find these things!?

[grundlepunch]

i made the OG thread and got less then a sub-par review

http://sisoffroad.com/forums/showthread.php?t=2232

[Lawn Guyland]

(403): you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.

[Lawn Guyland]

(561): I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes


(858): You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.

[Lawn Guyland]

(419): Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
(708): We need to hang out more often

[Lawn Guyland]

(201): we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer


(708): i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.

(347): I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot