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Okay, I've spent a lot of time thinking about this and it breaks my heart to have to say this, but it seems like I'll be voting for Obama in 2012. Now, hear me out on this one, it was a tough decision and I hope I can all sway you to do the same.
His foreign affairs are by far straight out of the Textbook for Genius Presidents. I mean look at Libya and our involvement. Just think, if Obama didn't send aid or get us involved, we wouldnt have all those awesome fucking pictures of Libyan Rebels shooting from office chairs in the middle of the desert or taking Jeeps and Toyotas and mounting guns all over them. It's like a photo album of an Anarchist's wet dream! Not to mention Osama Bin Laden, who Obama killed single handed with a cold 9" stainless steel hunting knife right to the fact. Obama is a fucking SEAL, can't you all see that? The whole thing with Mexico is just silly anyway, I mean, c'mon, I'm here Illegally (don't tell anyone). Actually no, tell everyone because whatever, Obama will make me a citizen anyway. In fact, Obama told the Boarder Patrol to let me in and game me a free bus ride to Connecticut. Nice guy, right?
His domestic policies are pretty awesome as well. He is essentially ruining the country just so we can revert back to the old west again with Anarchy and Lawlessness. I just picked up a single action in 45, I can't wait to get myself a leather holster and tame the OK Corral again! When the country lays in financial ruin, those with the guns and ammo will strive. Thanks Obama for making my dreams come true, All he has to do now is create zombies for me to shoot and I'll be living the high life. Obama also bases his life on Banning guns, to which the Republicans vastly oppose, but you know who makes out in the end? Gun Makers and Gunsmiths like me. The last Obama gun boom resulted in a sales increase of 500% over the span of just a few months. People who can barely spell their own name went out a bought guns and when they break, I fix 'em! It's awesome.
And really, what it all comes down to is if Obama leaves office, we can't make jokes about how Ugly she looks, about how her arms look like that of a Spider Monkey or how her face resembles pre-human apes.
Think about it guys, think about all the stuff we will lose when Obama is replaced. It'd be a heartbreaking day for us all.
His foreign affairs are by far straight out of the Textbook for Genius Presidents. I mean look at Libya and our involvement. Just think, if Obama didn't send aid or get us involved, we wouldnt have all those awesome fucking pictures of Libyan Rebels shooting from office chairs in the middle of the desert or taking Jeeps and Toyotas and mounting guns all over them. It's like a photo album of an Anarchist's wet dream! Not to mention Osama Bin Laden, who Obama killed single handed with a cold 9" stainless steel hunting knife right to the fact. Obama is a fucking SEAL, can't you all see that? The whole thing with Mexico is just silly anyway, I mean, c'mon, I'm here Illegally (don't tell anyone). Actually no, tell everyone because whatever, Obama will make me a citizen anyway. In fact, Obama told the Boarder Patrol to let me in and game me a free bus ride to Connecticut. Nice guy, right?
His domestic policies are pretty awesome as well. He is essentially ruining the country just so we can revert back to the old west again with Anarchy and Lawlessness. I just picked up a single action in 45, I can't wait to get myself a leather holster and tame the OK Corral again! When the country lays in financial ruin, those with the guns and ammo will strive. Thanks Obama for making my dreams come true, All he has to do now is create zombies for me to shoot and I'll be living the high life. Obama also bases his life on Banning guns, to which the Republicans vastly oppose, but you know who makes out in the end? Gun Makers and Gunsmiths like me. The last Obama gun boom resulted in a sales increase of 500% over the span of just a few months. People who can barely spell their own name went out a bought guns and when they break, I fix 'em! It's awesome.
And really, what it all comes down to is if Obama leaves office, we can't make jokes about how Ugly she looks, about how her arms look like that of a Spider Monkey or how her face resembles pre-human apes.
Think about it guys, think about all the stuff we will lose when Obama is replaced. It'd be a heartbreaking day for us all.
Vice President of Internal Affairs at Dirty Donny's House of Hookers
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