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I'm going to help you Illiterate Fucks write Better.

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  • I'm going to help you Illiterate Fucks write Better.

    1) Avoid alliteration. Always.
    2) Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
    3) Avoid cliches like the plague. (They're old hat.)
    4) Employ the vernacular.
    5) Eschew ampersands & abbreviations, etc.
    6) Parenthetical remarks (however relevant) are unnecessary.
    7) It is wrong to ever split an infinitive.
    8) Contractions aren't necessary.
    9) Foreign words and phrases are not apropos.
    10) One should never generalize.
    11) Eliminate quotations. As Ralph Waldo Emerson once said: "I hate quotations. Tell me what you know."
    12) Comparisons are as bad as cliches.
    13) Don't be redundant; don't use more words than necessary; it's highly superfluous.
    14) Profanity fucking sucks.
    15) Be more or less specific.
    16) Understatement is always best.
    17) Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
    18) One-word sentences? Eliminate.
    19) Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
    20) The passive voice is to be avoided.
    21) Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
    22) Even if a mixed metaphor sings, it should be derailed.
    23) Who needs rhetorical questions?
    sigpic
    Official Space Shuttle Door Gunner of the Chechnyan Space Program

  • #2
    your gay
    - Will


    Originally posted by fizzy
    or am asians pants not a read end lol.
    Originally posted by DizzDizz
    aliens probed my husband

    Comment


    • #3
      RangerZ24 (1:12:00 AM): thread: OVER
      sigpic
      Official Space Shuttle Door Gunner of the Chechnyan Space Program

      Comment


      • #4
        your stewpid.

        ima go learn me a book.
        2000 XJ: "The Black Jeep"
        MK2 Jetta > M3
        Chairman of the Chechnyan Space Program

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        • #5
          Nice Phil, I'm going to show this to my journalism professor today hahaha
          "Watching you work on your Jeep is like watching a doctor operate on a cadaver...
          It may be good practice, but in the end it won't do much good." -My Mother.

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          • #6
            i know less than half of what all those words mean.
            #becauseJoeNitro

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            • #7
              mr pessimistic is gonna take on the hardest task in the history of SiS? HA!
              2009 silver JK - destination beachy jeep
              J10 project do want.
              "attack life. its just going to kill you anyway"

              Comment


              • #8
                fuuuuuuuccccckkkk soooonnn!

                Comment


                • #9


                  this should get interesting
                  mrs. heavymetal from jeepforum
                  2022 JL Rubicon

                  Originally posted by hoggie101
                  and everyone qute dis because its the best grammer im going to have all year

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    This legit made me lawl
                    dirty30

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                    • #11
                      I need better typing skills, thats about 75% of my problem!

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Props Philiano, that was awesome.
                        2013 F150 fx4 (Tow Pig/DD)
                        • 5.0 with the 3.73 option

                        2003 TJ Rubicon
                        • 4.0/42rle/np241or
                        • 5.13's
                        • 3" Savvy/Currie suspension with acos
                        • 33” BFG KO2s

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                        • #13
                          whats a prepopsition
                          Dizz dizz go sleep sleep

                          Driver 4677 FSM vehicle

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Supermanxj View Post
                            Props Philiano, that was awesome.
                            I'll admit, I didn't write this, but I found it funny as hell and figured I needed to share.

                            Originally posted by dizzy View Post
                            whats a prepopsition
                            You do know what a Proposition is, so if you don't start using punctuation in your sentences, you are not allowed to drink Alcohol at KOH.
                            sigpic
                            Official Space Shuttle Door Gunner of the Chechnyan Space Program

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                            • #15
                              Phil, as literate as you are, I still think Neil might take offense to some of the above statements.
                              Watch your backhoe, I'm the John Deere man.

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